A person who is not interested in having a romantic relationship with their partner is called an aromantic. Aromantic people love their partners deeply. It’s just that they don’t want to put a romantic element in the relationship. Even so, aromantic people can marry and have long-term relationships.
Towards Valentine’s Day, there are usually several couples who have prepared romantic surprises. Most people, especially women, feel happy when their partners give flowers, invite them to dinner at beautiful restaurants, and do other romantic things. In fact, there are also people who are not interested in having a romantic relationship with their partner. People like this are called aromantic.
If your partner is not romantic, maybe he is an aromantic, you know. However, that doesn’t mean that aromatic people don’t love their partners. Aromantic people can love their partners very deeply, just don’t want to put any romantic elements into the relationship. To be clearer, see the reviews about aromantic here.
What is Aromantic?
Starting from fairy tales about royal princes and princesses told in childhood, to Valentine’s Day celebrations, you are probably used to seeing romantic love relationships. It’s no wonder that many people think that love and romance are two things that can’t be separated. However, there is actually a distinct difference between love and romance.
MRI scan studies show that romantic love has distinct neurochemical and hormonal profiles that can influence functional reasoning. That’s why when you’re just in a romantic love relationship with someone else, you tend to ignore logic, ignore responsibility, and ignore the flaws of the person you love.
Romantic love involves intense, intimate, and passionate feelings towards a partner. You probably can’t help but smile when you think of him, you want to learn everything about him and be with your partner for as long as possible.
Well, aromatic people don’t have feelings like that, from the beginning of the relationship and after. They also don’t desire to have a romantic relationship and feel fine with that.
Aromantic is not the same as asexual
Aromantic is often considered the same as asexual. In fact, the two are different conditions.
Asexual means that you have no sexual attraction to other people, even though you may be interested in being in a romantic relationship. Even so, some people who are asexual can still have sex, while others choose to be celibate.
Well, the term aromantic has nothing to do with sex. This means you are not interested in having a romantic relationship with other people, even though you may be sexually attracted to that person.
A person can be aromatic, asexual, or both.
Wrong Understanding About Aromantis
Reading the explanation above, you might think that an aromatic person is a person who is cold-hearted and emotionless. Aromantic people can develop intense feelings of love, but they are not romantic. They can still love loving their partner, children, family, friends and pets.
Aromantic people are also not against romantic things at all. They can still enjoy a romantic song or movie, even if they don’t expect to be involved in a romantic relationship themselves.
When it comes to physical intimacy, aromatic people can have different preferences. However, some aromatics prefer not to be touched or touched by others. While other people generally enjoy these things, like holding hands or hugging.
What Kind of Relationships Do Aromantics Have?
That’s not to say that aromantic people don’t desire a long-term companion. Many aromantic people have partners for life.
In some ways, they may not form a relationship like the average couple. However, an aromatic relationship, like any other long-term relationship, often includes things like:
- Committed to having an exclusive relationship
- Living with a partner (cohabitation)
- Sexual activity
- Physical affection
Aromantic people can also marry. They are also responsible for traditional aspects of marriage, such as sharing property and finances, or having and raising children.
Recently, the virtual world has been shocked by the news of someone who has an interest in someone wrapped in a cloth. Perpetrators often ask someone to wrap himself in the same method as when going to bury the body. Of course, this caused many people to wonder how could anyone have an interest in this strange thing.
This disorder is also known as sexual fetishism. The sufferer feels sexual arousal in something that most people think is impossible to increase libido. Someone with sexual fetishism will feel stimulation when touching the object he wants or even just imagining it. Then, what is the medical explanation for this disorder? Here’s the full review.
Medical Explanation of Sexual Fetishism
Sexual fetishism is the emergence of a strong sexual attraction to inanimate objects or certain body parts that are generally not seen as sexual objects. It can also be exacerbated by significant pressure or clinical disturbance. This disorder is actually a normal part of sexuality. However, problems can arise when sexual arousal, requires an object that ultimately imposes its will on another person.
Quoted from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), this sexual fetishism can be characterized as a condition that has a strong urge for inanimate objects, such as underwear. In addition, this can also occur in very specific body parts, such as the feet, to achieve sexual arousal. Only in this way can the person with the disorder obtain sexual satisfaction.
In addition, as reported by Psychology Today, sexual fetishism is a disorder that is more common in men than women. In fact, it is said that this disorder almost exclusively occurs in men. This disorder is included in the general category of paraphilic disorders, which cause a person to have a sexual attraction to objects or body parts other than genital stimulation.
Causes of Sexual Fetishism
A fetishism disorder that is part of a paraphilic disorder that usually occurs at the start of puberty, but may develop before adolescence. Some sources say that sexual fetishism can develop from someone’s experiences as a child. This may be related to conditions associated with masturbation and puberty.
In other cases that attack men, some experts argue that this sexual fetishism disorder occurs due to doubts about the potential or fear of rejection and humiliation from others. By having a sexual urge for inanimate objects, the sufferer can protect himself from feelings of inadequacy or rejection of something.
Treatment of Sexual Fetishism
Fetishistic sexual disorders are common and in most cases harmless. It can only be treated as a nuisance when it interferes with a person’s ability to function normally in everyday life. In addition, this disorder also tends to fluctuate in intensity and urge to do things that are not natural.
Therefore, effective treatment of sexual fetishism is usually carried out in the long term. Some common treatments are in the form of cognitive therapy and medication therapy. Some prescription drugs can help sufferers to reduce the compulsive thoughts associated with fetishism disorder. This method allows the sufferer to concentrate on counseling with minimal distractions.
Anti-androgenic drugs are usually consumed by someone with this disorder in order to temporarily lower testosterone levels. This type of drug can also be taken together with other medicines in order to reduce the disorder. This method is said to be effective for reducing sex drive in men and can reduce the frequency of mental images that can arouse sexual arousal.
Well, that’s an explanation of the disorder of sexual fetishism which is currently being widely discussed. Therefore, if you or someone close to you experiences symptoms of this disorder, it is better to get medical treatment immediately. That way, it’s not impossible to recover so it can return to normal.
Pan lover? No, instead they are lovers at their best. Confused isn’t it? Lately, there have been many new terms, especially for sexual orientation and gender identity. Let’s learn a little about pansexuality, what it means, and how to support friends who are pansexual.
Definition of Pansexual
Pansexual is a term that refers to sexual and romantic interests without considering the gender and gender identity of the person they like (LGBT Foundation, 2019). Pansexuality is included in the type of sexual orientation.
Pansexuality is not a sexual deviance.
Sexual orientation refers to the gender that is considered “attractive” both sexually and romantically (APA, 2012). Pansexuality is not just limited to sexual attraction, it can involve romantic as well as emotional attraction.
To make things clearer, here’s a short example:
A man who is attracted to women who are very feminine, beautiful face and long hair. However, he can also be attracted to someone who is genderfluid with a beautiful face and long hair. This man can also be attracted to men whose faces look feminine.
You might think that someone who is pansexual likes, everyone, this is true, but still not very accurate. Pansexual individuals also have preferences for their ideal partner.
However, he can be attracted to anyone who fits his “criteria” regardless of gender. Both the people he likes are men, and women, genderfluid (changes between men and women), and Agender (does not identify gender).
So how do you help a friend who is pansexual?
How to Support a Friend Who Is Pansexual?
As a member of society and as a good friend, it’s also good to learn how to support our friends who are “coming out.” For those of you who don’t know, the term “coming out” is a moment when someone admits/tells their sexual orientation or preference to someone who is very close to them. As close and trusted friends, we need to cherish those moments and accept them (or not, that’s up to you).
Dr. Sera Lavelle, a clinical psychologist at NY Health Hypnosis & Integrative Therapy advises parents or romantic partners to have an “open mind” about pansexuality. Pansexuality has only recently been accepted, and it often becomes confusing for individuals who find themselves pansexual. These individuals need support as they work to understand their own feelings.
Dr. Sera Lavelle also added, “If your romantic partner is open and comfortable, just ask about their openness and willingness to discuss their pansexuality.” This discussion can help in building a deeper connection and an open and non-discriminatory understanding of the feelings he is experiencing.
A national survey from the Trevor Project with 28,000 participants showed a high rate of discrimination against friends who are LGBT by 71%. Individuals who experienced discrimination were more likely to attempt suicide (22%) than those who were not discriminated against (9%). As many as 39% of respondents to the survey seriously considered attempting suicide in the last 12 months.
An open mind and a desire to understand can help our LGBT friends and ourselves. Given the current direction of world development, it is not surprising that this term will become increasingly popular and experienced by more and more individuals. We need to “prepare” and learn more so that we can increase our understanding by seeing the world through their eyes.
Pansexual and Bisexual Differences
The main difference between pansexual and bisexual is the amount or extent of their sexual preferences. According to Healthline (Ferguson, 2019) some parts of the LGBT community respond to the term bisexual as “not recognizing the existence of Non-binary”. The word “bi” in bisexual also means “two” and can be confusing, because it can mean;
- Like 2 or more genders
- Or, like men and women
Both interpretations remain generally accepted, but can sometimes be confusing to those who are not familiar with the terms. It’s a little confusing at first, but you’ll get the hang of it. To clarify, maybe we liken it to using color:
- Albert likes bright colors, like pink, khaki, pandan green and so on. However, she does not like dark colors
- Meanwhile, Albert likes all colors. Whether it’s a bright or dark color.
Using the interpretation of bisexual as “liking 2 or more genders”, Albert is included as bisexual because he likes various individuals of various genders, but not all of them. Meanwhile, Dino can be classified as pansexual because he likes individuals regardless of gender (all genders, including gender and non-binary).
Indeed, there is no absolute and absolute agreement regarding these two sexual orientations, there is even debate. However, most agreed on the explanation of the characteristics along with the basic things regarding the two sexual orientations.